I have been thinking a lot about motherhood lately.
(NO, I'm STILL not pregnant.)
(NO, I'm STILL not pregnant.)
Everyone is having babies, and let's face it, it's the next big thing coming up in my life, too. I've thought a lot about what kind of mother I want to be, and what I want my kids to remember me as. It's no surprise to most of you that I am worried about that kind of thing, and worried about being able to be a good mom. I love my own mother, but for a lot of reasons, I feel unsure about my abilities to be a mother. I don't trust that I can be the kind of mother I want, and sometimes, I don't think I even know what that looks like.
What gives me hope is that I have known so many amazing examples of mothers, and the type of mother I want to be. I was thinking today about all of my second "mothers" I've had in this life--people I've known from my ward, like Janeanne Driggs, who has a big heart of gold, or Nelda Burnside, who was always sweet and kind to everyone. Or people I've been related to, like my saintly Aunt Ruth, Aunt Becky, and Aunt Char who taught me so much about true charity and forgiveness. Or my sisters who are mothers and teach me that even though we didn't have it the easiest growing up, I can still be better than I was raised to be. Or like my cousin Stephanie, who isn't completely a mom yet, but will be soon! I have had a lot of second mothers, and I'm so glad I've been able to see their example. It has taught me how to pattern my life after theirs, so that someday hopefully I, too, will be like them.
I have looked up to all the mothers I have known, but there's two lately that I have noticed and that have truly helped motivate me to become a better person, NOW. They are both around my age, and are starting out in the process of motherhood. I have long admired these two women, as well as their solid marriages. I read both of their blogs often and am amazed at the calm love they have for their families. Here are a couple of things I've noticed about both of them:
1. They take true joy in motherhood. They seem so calm and happy in their marriages, and I see that reflected in the descriptions of their days. They aren't trying to put on a show like some Mommy bloggers to prove to others that they really do love changing poopy diapers, they are just being sincere in their simple, yet bottomless, love for their children.
2. They are without guile. This kind of goes with what I was saying above. They aren't just saying things to say them, they are saying them because they are heartfelt and earnest.
3. They appreciate and thank their spouses regularly. They are such a good example to me of truly loving one's spouse. I see them both taking time to thank their husbands for small acts of service.
4. They take time to spend quality time and do fun, uplifting activities with their family. Whether it's just cooking a fancy meal or going hiking as a family, they have shown me that they spend time with each other. They take time to bond with each other.
5. They find joy in making a home. Neither one of them would consider themselves an expert homemaker yet, but they find happiness in learning new skills and talents they can put to use in their homes.
6. Most importantly, they love and live the Gospel of Jesus Christ. As I've read their blogs, this is what I have discovered is the underpinnings of their greatness, not only in these two, but in all of my "second mothers." The Gospel brings you true and lasting joy--not just passing moments of happiness, but REAL joy. These two women have inspired me to live a life that is closer to the Savior.
I know this post is a little more sappy than usual, but I wanted to share what I learned about the mother I want to become. I know that keeping the Gospel in our lives can bless us so much, and I am so grateful for the examples of motherhood that I have had all around me.